Tuesday, 23 May 2017

Penning Down Thoughts

I never had the habit of journaling, and it was never my thing. You see, I had a hard time polishing my language skills. Having grown up and educated in a Chinese primary school and surrounded by Chinese-speaking community at least two third of my life, I had the tendency to speak and think in Chinese. English was out of my realm of mastery. Mandarin Chinese is my mother tongue after all.

Ironically I have been widely misunderstood as being a 'banana' - a Chinese who only speaks English. 

It seems I do have a 'banana' look. I have been told that I speak and write English better than my Chinese sentences, which the latter often seems to be awkward and to some extent, trying too hard. Can't really blame me right? I have not been consistently writing Chinese for the past 10 years. But this is blatantly deceiving! My English proficiency has not always been acceptable. Reading back my blog posts even just 5 years ago brought myself to embarrassment. In short, I did not have the habit of writing.

Only after coming back from the UK, my English has become slightly better. Still I did not write often. Occasionally updating my blog does not count as a tool of penning down my thoughts. What about devotion? Good point! I do not have the habit to write. I will read and read, and ponder about the points. I will pray about those points, but I realised the points will fade away slowly if I failed to find direct relevance to my current circumstance. 

Today is slightly different. When I was doing devotion, I was prompted to write down the lies about beauty and past, which I do not intend to share yet as they are something personal to me. But I have found great clarity by writing them down! Greater clarity on issues allows me to look at a bigger picture, which in turn allows me to focus and meditate on the PRIMARY solution. It can be a single Scripture, a Word from God or an inspiration from the Spirit for Him to speak into the situation. 

I'm glad I am starting to utilise this tool of journaling. Try it yourself too, if you had not already! 

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