Sunday, 28 February 2010

A Visit From My Cousins!!! ^_^

Since yesterday, my mom got excited with the visit from some group of people i heard as her friends and relatives. So as i saw my mom talking on the phone happily this morning, my curiosity aroused with those people and hence i asked my mom after she stop talking with her friends. My mom said, "Later your cousins and my colleagues would come to our house for a visit as for the substitution for the Chinese New Year." So, i knew that finally and got myself prepared for everything. My mom and my aunt from Kuala Kangsar went to the market this morning to buy all the foods and stuffs needed for the gathering just now, and time really flew at a fast pace, without noticing much, my mom's colleagues have arrived at my house and the ladies started to give my mom a hand on preparing for the dinner.

Not long after, my cousins from Bukit Mertajam arrived as well and as usual, some ladies went into the kitchen to give their hands. There were quite a number of people inside this house just now, which were 6 mans and 9 ladies, gave a total of 15 person. At 8.30pm, everything was set and well prepared by the ladies. Thanks to them, the dinner looked really great and scrumptious. There were spaghetti served with tomato sauce, cheese, sausages and meat as well as a large pot of steamboat with the vast variety of seafoods. Well, for me, i have ate a lot of spaghetti served with cheese, sausages and meat cause that was really appetizing. While for the steamboat, i don't even touched it since i ate it quite a number of times during the Chinese New Year period back then. At last, there were even round Tiramisu cake and fresh fruits as the desserts for everyone just now. I ate the fresh fruits a lot as they are my favorites since i was still an immature small little boy.

Just now, at 11pm sharp, some of my cousins have to take a move as they need to head for Ipoh. As the aftermath, everyone started to take a move, following them to various destinations. So now, i'm writing this blog and have a belly fulled with foods. Overall, i was quite contented with the gathering today, and i really hoped that many other opportunities would be heading on in future. =)

Recom!!! Where are you? =(

For a few days, Recom seemed to be pulled down due to some servers' traffic congestion. If I'm not mistaken, since the last 4 days, Recom encountered this problem and couldn't surfed by anyone, including me and my Recom's  friends. Since i have been quite active there for these few months, i started to feel empty without logging in into Recom for just a few days. In fact, it started last week where the screen appeared as "The user account has been terminated." Every kind of thoughts trickled out my mind, saying that maybe the website has been hijacked by spammers or something else with the similar capability, or maybe the website encountered some crash down at the domain. Even funnier post have been posted by one of my friends in the House of Spammers(HOS), saying that she thought that she has been hated by the moderators. It was just so hilarious and none of the other posts can beat her post. =)) Hmm, just hoped that Recom can be recovered soon and fill my precious time even more beneficially. ^_^

Saturday, 27 February 2010

Learnt to be strong!!! =)

After getting a few pals' advices, finally i realized, nothing in this spiteful world is worthwhile for me to scattered my hopes and heart. Sometimes, things doesn't go on like our anticipation, and we must always learn how to be strong and tough. Sometimes, we should just stand up again after fell down, cry out loud and let something go. Sometimes, we should always being considerate to others, especially when things come to a halt. We should not be self-centered and unable to think about others.

After few days of being sad, i decided to stop all this sorrow and let time to decide our destiny. Maybe the relationship will be fruitful, or maybe the relationship would not have a happy ending. I wholly understood your decision and reasons of doing so. Whatever our fate is, i just wish to sincerely apologize to you. I'm sorry, Nodame. =)

I renounced!!! =(

Tears is the most precious liquid ever flow out from a girl's eyes, and yesterday night is the first time she cry out, for me and in front of me. I'm really sorry, i didn't meant to hurt her and i hoped i didn't. From now on, i swear that i won't bother her anymore, and she would no need to offline to fix everything back to normal now. I just want her to live happily, and she would no need to care about my feeling, whether I am sad or happy. I know i'm not worth it for you to cry about. My heart is brittle and scattered now, and i don't think anyone else has the glue for me. I just need to be alone, until the glue for my dispersed heart appears from her. I won't find anyone else, and i will still wait for her even until i succeed in my own career. =(

Thursday, 25 February 2010

Sad... again!!! =(

She glued my heart and gave me hopes, but now, she smashed it again, and i don't know why. She just can't get rid of her phobia of past history and give me a chance of starting a new relationship. She said that i need to wait for a very very long time, maybe years, just to wait for her answer, and now i afraid that i'd don't have enough confidence, braveness and capability for me to wait for such a long time. I thought that i have the glue that can be used to heal her scattered heart, but then i was wrong. I hoped that i do have, and i know that i have. But she still doubt of the toughness and strength of my glue, which i think my glue would be strong enough to stick her scattered heart, albeit it might be imperfect and leave scars. I know that our relationship might not have a happy ending, but i will try my very best to secure it, from any obstacle that might be faced. Yes, everything is uncertainty and have a risk to happen, but i strongly believed that the risk can be managed and reduced, if our hearts are strong enough. People who dare not bear risk would not have much success in everything they do. As life goes on, we must learn how to be strong, to solve problems, and I really hoped that she can give me a chance, to learn and know each other better. =)

STPM and SPM results!!! ^_^

25 February 2010,  a very significant date to all the Form 6 2009 students as the main STPM results are being announced today at every school that offers Form 6 classes. New top students from the exam'd be unearthed today and tomorrow to the whole nation of Malaysia, and i really hoped that no matter how was the result for every candidate, they can succeed in their future endeavor. Now i'm wondering how was the result of Johnivan, an unlucky Recommer who is an orphan since he was 9 years old. Hmm, surely he'd get stupendous result in it, hope so. =)

From Ke Yang's blog, a news that would wreck every SPM 2009's candidates' nerves spread from his school, saying that SPM 2009 result would be announced on 11 March 2009. It is proven when his school received a letter from the National Education Department about the announcement date. However, a question kept on tricking out from my mind, which is, how about the PLKN peers? Is that meant that they would receive their results in the camp and repeat the history of the year 2003? Nevertheless, i still hoped that every candidate can achieve their desired result on that day. =) All the best, everyone. ^_^

Time!!! ^_^

Time. That's the only thing i need to give her now, give her enough time to clear her phobia over the past history. I'm really glad that she didn't mean to hurt my heart nor intendedly did so, and in fact i can feel her "rose" too, if you know what did i meant. The only fundamental thing now is time, so lets all be decided by time. How did i proved my statement? Just now she sent me two songs by Mariah Carey, which were "Through The Rain" and "Thank God I Found You", and from the two songs, i can feel her "rose". Thanks a lot for trusting me, and i believed that i'd have enough patience and time in waiting for her decision. I'd give her time as long as possible, and i hoped that it would be worthwhile in the end. =) 

Wednesday, 24 February 2010

Rejected!!! T.T

Sad. It's the only word that embraces me now. I started to feel that i can't succeed in everything i do including relationship. I'm just feeling sad that she knew it and intendedly hurt me. I wish to hate her, but i can't. I just can't do it. She was a special person for me, and she was different from others that i knew. She was the first person who gave me roses, even though they were counterfeit one. But still, i hoped that when she's ready to have any relationship, i'd be available for her. Hoped that my feeling won't be faded with time. =)

Feeling Awfully Disappointed!!! ~.~

The person i have waited for such a long time, didn't seemed to realize anything about my feeling to her. I know i have made a wrong choice, wrong in getting interested in her. For a couple of times, she hurt me with her words either accidentally or maybe intendedly, i don't know. Every time after she realized that i was sad, she'd try her very best to console me and not to make me sad. However, every time due to my soft heart, i'd just forgive her and pretend that nothing has just happened. I know, she don't want to have any relationship for now due to her past history, but i just made a wrong choice. I just feeling peculiar as i have gave her a lot of hints on my feeling, yet she still didn't realized it, maybe she was heartless, or maybe she knew about it and acted to know nothing. I just don't really know about it. Maybe, i should just give up on this. I just don't know. For me, love is about caring about somebody and wanting the person to live happily and smile always. I knew that she'd definitely read this, and i hoped that we'd at least still be friends in the end. =)

Learning Maths again!!! ^_^

This morning, before going for the car driving lesson, i opened up Youtube again and started my maths lesson once again. Today, i started to learn the topics of Polynomials, which is the second chapter of the Maths T Form 6 STPM. I found it quite easy and fun, where the x has a larger power which are 3, 4, 5,.... and even 8. I just learnt about addition and subtraction as well as the long division of Polynomials. However, when i studied about the topic of Partial Fraction in Polynomials, i found it quite difficult to understand at first, but as i proceed the learning lesson, and stop for a while for thoughts, finally i understood about it. Great lesson though! ^_^

Oh, i have also learnt Probability Density Function just now and found it almost the same as the graph of Normal Distribution, so it was quite easy too. Hope that i was not wrongly interpreted it, feel free to correct me if i was wrong. Besides, i tried to study Correlation and Regression from the last chapter of Further Maths T F6 STPM, but ended up didn't understand most of it. Just hoped that someone can teach me about this chapter. =) 

My First Car Driving Lesson!!! ~.~


Oh My Gosh, the first car driving lesson was a catastrophe!!! I straight away learnt it right after the instructor reached in front of my house, and it was the first time i put on the first gear with a full press on the clutch pedal. The engine didn't stopped luckily and i was glad that the car move smoothly when i press some power pedal for the very first time. However, while drove down the slope near my house, something wrong happened. I brake too much and the car went to a sudden stop with the engine dead. I just can't get used to the three main pedals and confused with it for the very first time. Now, finally i understood what is the feeling when my friends said that they confused with the position of three pedals, plus, my house don't have any manual gear car. So, it's normal if i can't get used to it for the very first time. 

Then, without forgetting the signal light, i turned to the direction where the instructor said, and all of these happened on the road. On the road, yes you're right, and i have to watch out really carefully for every single fast moving vehicle including the bulky lorries and the tiny motorcycles. Then, i drove to the new house lot residential area carefully and arrived at a free empty car parking lot. Yup, i trained myself there and drove for a few rounds of the same route at the almost-empty car parking lot. I enjoyed myself there and get used to normal driving. At first, i press the power pedal too hard and the car was driven fast until the instructor pressed the extra break to a sudden stop. After get used to the driving, i learnt ways to slow down the car during corner, stop my car completely and switch to the first gear after fully press on the clutch pedal, release the clutch pedal a little bit whilst press the power pedal lightly until the car start moving, keep on pressing the clutch at the level where the car start moving, switch to the reverse gear by using exactly the same way of first gear and lastly, three-point turn. 

Everything was quite fun, but the three-point turn was a little bit harder and different from the other ways of driving. Plus, the Perodua Kancil's steering was very hard to be turned at the zilch speed, as the aftermath i was quite exhausted just for turning the steering. I have done it for above ten times and finally get used to the three-point turn, but i have accidentally stopped my car's engine for a couple times while i switched to the first gear. After having rock and roll for one and a half hour, i drove back on the familiar road to my house, and that is it, my very first car driving car lesson. I thought it was quite a disaster for me, but in turn the instructor told me that it is normal for a beginner to drive like that and praised me, saying that i was quite fast in learning. Overall, the whole car driving lesson was an unforgettable experience for me, maybe for the next ten years. =) 

Hoped that i can be better in the next driving lesson next week. ^_^ 

Tuesday, 23 February 2010

Solitary!!! T.T

Tonight, unaware for the reasons of why i was feeling this, I was so lonely, alone, without any special entertainment that attracts me much. I really wish to have a special person to chat with right now. =)

Wooohooo~ My First Car Driving Lesson!!! ^_^

Yes!!!! EEeeeeee harrrrr~ Finally i'm going to learn my very very first car driving lesson that i have been dreamed for months, or maybe years. So excited to the extent until i can't express it in words. I love driving, albeit i still don't know ways to drive practically, but for the theories, i have even knew the ways to drifting. Hor hor.. just kidding la... but i really wished to learn drifting in future, practically, and not merely by theories. Hope that i can enjoy my very first and sweet car driving lesson tomorrow!!! ^_^

My brain is rusting!!! T.T

My sister asked questions about Chemistry and i don't know how to answer the questions!!! Oh My God, what should i do to relearn the topics i have learnt in secondary years? Thanks God, i still know a little bit of it and after relearned it, i was able to answer the questions. This's the quote i have learnt today, which is:

"Life is about unlearn, relearn and continue to learn."    

 Raymond Lai, Ex-President of Actuarial Society of Malaysia(ASM) 

Relieve finally!!!! ^_^

Just now, while i was being sad due to her, after a long time, the condition changed, and she suddenly became emo and refused to talk to me. Even though i have tried hard to apologize to her, she still didn't reply any message and i have almost out of ideas to persuade her, so i decided to go took a nap. When i woke up just now, she was online still and so i try my luck once again. After 15 minutes, this is the message she sent to me(as below) and finally, she forgave me. Sorry because of i was being emo to you, and i promised i'd never be like that to you anymore. Thanks for forgiving me anyway. =)

when air gets thinner
life gets harder.
sometimes we just get mad over a little thing.
and i'm not that cool.
i'm sorry.
i don't want u to be alone.
lonely.
bcoz. i'm here.
thnx for those roses that u gave to me.
that whispered sorry.
i kinda emo just now.sorry.

let's get over it.

case's closed.

Learning Maths out of boredom!!! ^_^

So boring for these few weeks and have plenty of time to kill, I opened up Youtube and started to learn college maths. 4 days ago, i just learnt complex numbers (addition, subtraction, multiplication and division) and it was quite simple and fun. The only key for this is square root -1 = i, and i square = -1, that's all. The others are just the simple maths I have learnt in my secondary school. 


2 days ago, I started to learn the basic formula of Poisson Distribution and the ways to use the formula in solving maths problems. It is almost the same as the Binomial Distribution, but the probability calculated by using Poisson Distribution'd be more roughly than by using the Binomial Distribution. The formula of Poisson Distribution is as below:




Wondering what to learn next... hmmm... =) 

SPM result rumors!!! ~.~

For these few days, a lot of rumors about the SPM result releasing date being transferred from ear to ear by using advanced gadgets such as hand phone and internet. Most of them mentioned about February 29 would be the date where all the results being sent to the Jabatan Pendidikan Negara(JPN), whilst March 16 would be the date where the actual SPM result being announced. Some of the rumors even said about the result'd be announced in end of February, but i don't think it is true because the PLKN peers still haven't completed the training. A very good example can be seen in the year 2003, where the first badge of PLKN trainees received their SPM result in the camp, and since that year onward, SPM results being released few days after the PLKN trainees completed their training, and i don't think this year'd be an exception year. Actually, deep inside my heart, i don't really mind the date of the result being released as i know, everything has been set since the very moment of stepping out the exam hall. In fact, i really wished that the result can be announced as fast as possible, because i can't stand the terrible horrible boringness for these few months any longer.

I just wrecked my nerves in waiting for the releasing of the result, and i hoped that the result'd be my desired one. I know it's quite impossible in getting 10A+ but i know i have the chance in getting at least 3A+, for the others just merely As would be quite satisfying. So, i hoped that everyone'd achieve stupendous result in this SPM examination. Good luck and all the best!!! ^_^

Started to learn appreciation!!! ^_^

Well bloggers, I should have posted this long ago but due to my laziness and being creative of finding futile excuses, I didn't do so. But after thinking all over it again, i decided to post this for one of my friends who was very unlucky in his life. I just almost can't imagine how he got the power and strength to bear and suffer all this. He was one of the Recommers who have just done his F6 STPM and going to receive his result soon.

I just can't imagine how he touched my "cruel" heart with a single video, and you should believe this, I cried when i was watching this video. I started to learn appreciation where before this was a stranger term to me. I started to appreciate everything i have now, including my friends, life, computer, and most importantly, my dearest parents. I know in the previous post, i had being emo for quite a time with my parents and i know i shouldn't, after watching this. Anyway, I'm glad that he's now one of the top students. Good luck, my friend, and thanks in advance for waking me up from the mist. Here is the story of my friend, hope he'd don't mind for me to post it here. 

Saturday, 20 February 2010

Back to home from my dearest hometown!!! ^_^

    I know I should have posted this 2 days ago, but due to my tiredness and laziness that overwhelming me so much that day, I didn't update anything about my whole voyage of Chinese New Year. Since I went back to my hometown in Penang for Chinese New Year last Sunday until I came back to my sweet lovely home, I was prohibited from online as there was no Internet connection in my hometown in Balik Pulau, Penang, and as you might have predicted, I was totally tormented in realm of boringness for these few days. The good thing is, I got a lot of ang pow this year albeit it is less than the previous years and that totally cheers me up.

    From the radio and television program, i heard that those who born in Monkey years'd have less luck in almost everything this year and the most unlucky Chinese zodiac for this Tiger year is the Monkey. Maybe due to that unproven statement, believe it or not, I have vomited twice at the first night of Chinese New Year in my hometown. I had excessive gas inside my stomach and that withhold my digestion system from digesting my dinner. Everything i ate for my dinner expelled and my stomach felt so empty. At 2am that night, I suddenly felt uneasy and woke up to vomit for the second time. I woke my mum up and she helped me by cleaning the basin fulled of disgusting substances and made me a cup of Milo mix with Nestum to fill up my empty stomach. At that very particular moment, I can feel the love from my mother and I felt deeply touched. Thanks mom, I love you!!! <<<333

    Just wondering, why the whether are freaking hot for these few days? From the newspaper as well as television news, the north part of Malaysia has been weeks since the last down pour and some water sources had even dried out. Could it be the effect of global warming just like what most of the people has been educated with but still lack of concern on it? Just thought that we should wake up right now from the millennium of advanced technologies and lean towards green technologies. Even when i was in my hometown, my grandmother's house to be precise, I often perspired even though sat under the swiftly fan. Glad that I came back home finally!!! ^_^

Saturday, 13 February 2010

Happy Chinese New Year 2010 and Happy Valentines Day everyone!!! ^_^




An hour more before Chinese New Year 2010!!! ^_^  Wow, i'm really excited in awaiting for this year Chinese New Year. This year is my turning point year, where my major school life'd be changing gradually from the secondary high school into college or you may say as Pre-University life. For this year, i have to make a significant decision for my life changing path, whether to choose UPU, matriculation or Form 6 STPM. For me, i have applied for matriculation in my school last year with my teacher's help and paid for application of UPU. Now, i'm trapped between UPU, matriculation and Form 6 as my sister that was just came back from UTM said i can only choose one of them and i'd not be able to get three places concurrently.


For UPU, i can only choose diploma in engineering courses, computer science, technology management and some other diploma courses that i don't really interested in. My parents don't allow me to take computer science as too many people studied it and this field is too crowded now, in fact they told me to take up engineering courses. If i can't take actuarial science and the other related courses in diploma, there's only one field of engineering course in my mind, which are electrical engineering courses. However, i can't turn any way back if i take up diploma in engineering as i can't apply for any other course for my degree later on, which means it'd be the end for me to enter actuarial science for my degree or maybe for my whole life. However, i have paid RM11.60 for the pin numbers of UPU application process, so i have to apply no matter what despite i may lose out my chance of entering actuarial field. However, how about matriculation and Form 6? If  i really so lucky and get the diploma in engineering course, that means i really have to go for it as i have no other choice to make(Form 6 and matriculation). In the end, if i really insist in studying actuarial science, i have to study A-Level in private college with my own pocket money, which of course cost much more expensive compared to Form 6 and matriculation. I really need someone's  advices to help me out of this.


Tomorrow early in the morning, i'd be going back to my hometown which is in Penang Island to visit my grandmother and all my other relatives there. Well, i started to feel anxious and can't really wait longer for my first income(ang pao) tomorrow. Anyway, Happy Chinese New Year 2010 to all the Chinese worldwide!!! May this "Tiger" year bring prosperity, lucks, health and happiness to all!!! ^_^ Not to forget, Happy Valentines Day to all the couples!!! =)



Coincidently, 14 February is also my mum's birthday. Just want to wish her Happy Birthday here... hope that she'll be happy and healthy always.=)
                                                    
                                                 

Friday, 12 February 2010

I'm sad again!!! ~.~

Well, i know it not supposed for me to be sad at this time. Everyone is so happy waiting for the time to fly, as the Chinese New Year 2010 is just around the corner (1 day 5 hours and 48 minutes at the time i calculated this). However, there's always uncertainties for me to be sad, and it seems to be engraved at my heart this time. Ke Yang, you have asked me before in my previous post for the reason i am so sensitive about some certain jokes and now i decided to tell you and all other bloggers about it. Well, how should i start it??? Alright, everything got started with my parents. I believe, no matter how friendly a person to their peers, sometimes he/she'd have some difficult time with his/her parents due to the differences in their ideas, opinions, perspectives and also generation gap thinking. Exactly the same thing happened to me and i just can't resist it. Plus, my parents are just not like those ordinary parents. Almost everyday since the day i was born, my parents seldom have a peaceful time at home when both of them are around at the same time. They are just not romantic at all and i don't know how they got to know each other. Almost everyday, due to some petty things, they quarrel with each other and scold me or my sisters. Well, i have digressed too much on that and i'd be better to tell my stories straightforward now.

Just have a question to all bloggers who read this, can all of you stand tough in a family that filled with critics and cursing as well as scolding by parents almost everyday??? Well, that's exactly my situation now and i get scolded by my parents almost everyday. I've spent too much time in front of this computer until 3am everyday since the day i finished my major SPM exams and they just can't understood it. They thought i have been too obsessed with the computer and thought that i am totally insane. For these few days or maybe weeks, my parents got infuriated very easily and any petty thing that they dislike will ignite the "fire" inside them, and the victim'd be definitely me. They cursed and criticized me repetitively until i got really sad deep down my heart. I just can't feel the presence of love in this family. I just love my siblings, but seriously i don't have any feel of love towards my parents. The solution? Chatting with friends and expressing my feeling via Internet until i got better. I don't think i want to jolt down their cursing and critics here as i'd be more anguishing. Anyway, thanks to all my friends who patiently consoling me when i was really down every time, I've the courage to survive in this family without the presence of love. When can i free from all of these torments? I just can't bear it anymore. Someone please help me out of this!!! 

*Ke Yang, the jokes i meant just now are the sarcastically critics and curses.*

Wednesday, 10 February 2010

An unpredictable feeling in my heart!!!

Boring, boring and boring. Nothing seemed to erase this feeling from my heart for these few days and the only remedy for me was to online everyday and from there, my network friends started to play their role as my source of entertainment and answers to all my questions. I really appreciate it and thanks in advance. As i was chatting with a friend this morning, due to some jokes she made that i couldn't accept and i don't know why, unreasonably i became partially mad and sad. When she realized it, she apologized to me and kept on consoling me. As the aftermath, the potion of madness abruptly disappeared and the sense of sadness totally overwhelmed me by that time. Well, i have some personal problems that i can't share it here and due to it, my heart was rather delicate and I'd get sad very easily by certain unaccepted jokes. No matter how hard she was trying to console me, i still can't escaped from the unforgivable sadness and she just gave up(I thought) and out from the conversation by giving the reason of want to cook her lunch.

As the end of conversation, i continued to surfing the internet as usual, facebooking, recomming, etc. Two hours had passed and suddenly my friend that broke my heart just now buzzed me and gave me her blog's link. You guess it right, she sincerely apologized to me in her own personal blog and I just couldn't believe my eyes. For no reason, all my despicable sadness vanished into the thin air and I felt so touching and i really appreciate it until it gave me an inspiration of updating my blog. I just want to thank you and at the mean time, i genuinely apologize to you for being such an unreasonable person. Hope you don't mind and thanks in advance. Thanks for vanishing my boredness by entertaining me as your friend. Thanks for throwing me snowballs and making me "bleeding". Thanks for giving me advices and i'd try my best to follow them. Thanks for being a good listener of my problems. You are truly a good friend of mine even though you keep on saying that you are not. I really appreciate it and thanks for being my loyalty friend, Nodame. 

Regards, 

Nobita (Nicholas Ng)  

Tuesday, 2 February 2010

My invaluable results, plans and experiences!!!

    Well, everything seems to be out of my way now and i don't think i have much choices due to the aftermath of the scholarships' result. Apparently, i failed to secure any scholarship that i have applied by using my trial result, which are Bank Negara Scholarship, Khazanah Global Scholarship and Yayasan Sime Darby. For the YSD, i have not even being called up for the interview, maybe due to my chosen course that i have wrote in the essay about my career aspiration. I should have choose the course offered by the YSD and that should increase my chances to be called up for interview. Anyway, I have to congratulate my fellow Recomer "slappyfin3" as he have successfully secured the YSD scholarship and would be doing chemical engineering in the United States. For the Khazanah Global Scholarship, fortunately i have been called up for the stage 1 interview and i did realized that my chances of securing it is almost zilch as Khazanah would only sponsor around 10 candidates into its overseas program. However, there is no harm at all for me to attempt and i decided to try it out and hope for the best, and of course the worst.

    In that tranquil morning, my mom drove me to the UEM building where the Stage 1 interview would be held. I felt like having the butterflies inside my stomach and the sense of edgy just simply overwhelming me and it became so unbearable now. I have totally no idea of how the Stage 1 interview would going to be, and i have caught the wind from my friends saying that it would be an interview with the panels and yet i have not prepared anything. My session was scheduled from 10am till 12pm and that was the time where i have drafted my destiny. At 9.15am that day, i have reached the UEM building and surprisingly met my classmate, Danial Zikri who was also the head boy of my school last year. Hence, i started to chat with him and share my worries with him about the Stage 1 interview. When i saw that he was quite confident with the points about the information of Khazanah company, i started to agonize about it as i have not memorized most of the information albeit i did some researches that related to that listed company. After quite a few minutes, Nazrin showed up and we went for registration at the 7th floor of UEM building. Most of the candidates attended that day were fully residential schools' students as well as MRSM students. I hardly saw any Chinese peer there and fortunately Jeremy shown up not long after. Irsyad was appeared there too soon after Jeremy, and i really glad to see quite a number of my school's students had being selected for the Stage 1 interview.

    After the registration process at the counters there, we walked solemnly into the hall and sat on respective places and the whole assessment test begun soon after. I sat beside a student from KISAS and we became friends since then. Well, undoubtedly he was quite friendly and talk a lot with me, but of course not during the assessment tests. After a brief introduction about the assessment tests from the representatives from the Khazanah, the whole assessment test got started. Oh man... I have to admit that the tests were truly hard and i just can't corroborate the answer for every question i did, I mean almost every question. The test was separated into 5 different divisions, which were logics, abstract, story sequences, imagination and numerical ability. After 2 hours, eventually everything had passed and it seems like the heavy rock placed on my shoulder just now has finally disappeared. After a few days, i heard from my friends that they got an email saying that they would be going for the Stage 2 interview on 26 January and i abruptly realized that i have been eliminated from the process and this veto has totally ended my application for Khazanah Global Scholarship. Anyway, good luck to all of my pals in their future endeavor.

    Well, three weeks has passed and and there was no any special occurrence happened within me except for having a pleasant trip to the Higher Education Fair in Mid Valley two weeks ago. From there, i have found out a lot of private colleges and also the programs offered by them. For now, I'm interested in A-Level and discovered that some private colleges do offer certain percentages of tuition waiver, and some even reach 100% tuition waiver which means i don't have to pay anything provided that i have to score at least 9-10As in my actual SPM result. Some colleges have genuinely my attention due to their cheap yet stupendous achievement in the exams, such as Methodist College KL and ATC. If I would be taking A-Level, I would choose these few subjects as my preparation and exposure to the actuarial field, which are Maths, Further Maths, Economics and Accounting. However, there are always risk and uncertainties if i study A-Level on my own. How if i can't find any scholarship to fund my study upon completion and getting admission letters from the foreign universities? Do i have to give up my dreams then? Well, i have found the answers for my inquiries up there from Recom's seniors and they reckoned me to either take up loan or maybe search from everywhere for the scholarships which occasionally offered by foreign universities itself or maybe local companies. So thanks in advance to the seniors there. I'm really appreciate it for solving most of my problems. =)
  
    However, if i failed to secure any scholarship after the actual result came out, due to the inadequate cash in my wallet, I might have to go study Form 6 in the end as i don't want to be a financial burden to my parents. Hence, to pass my leisure time beneficially, I have planned for my study in Form 6 and after i did some researches on it, eventually I decided to survive in science stream. If and only if i have to study in Form 6, I would take up Maths T, Further Maths T, Physics and lastly, Pengajian Am (General Studies) which is also a compulsory subject. For Further Maths T, I have to check out with the school for the teacher as there are very few students taking Further Maths T in their STPM due to the hardness of this subject. There is also no fixed reference book for Further Maths T STPM due to the number of candidates each year. However, i am determined to take it as this subject can train me to have a rigorous thinking skill in maths and act as a exposure and preparation for my future study later on. For that, I have asked abundance of inquiries in Recom and thanks to all the helpful seniors there, i have got most of the answers for my questions. I'm really appreciate it and thanks in advance. =)

    Well, just want to tell a cheerful story about me, which is I have done my first and last driving law's  computerized test yesterday and passed it with flying colors, which is 47/50 in 8 minutes!!! Wow, so impressive... Thanks to my parents and kin, the exercise book, the computer, the lecturers, the agent and everything for supporting me through out the test. Thank you!!! ^_^

Favourite Music! =)