Friday, 12 February 2010

I'm sad again!!! ~.~

Well, i know it not supposed for me to be sad at this time. Everyone is so happy waiting for the time to fly, as the Chinese New Year 2010 is just around the corner (1 day 5 hours and 48 minutes at the time i calculated this). However, there's always uncertainties for me to be sad, and it seems to be engraved at my heart this time. Ke Yang, you have asked me before in my previous post for the reason i am so sensitive about some certain jokes and now i decided to tell you and all other bloggers about it. Well, how should i start it??? Alright, everything got started with my parents. I believe, no matter how friendly a person to their peers, sometimes he/she'd have some difficult time with his/her parents due to the differences in their ideas, opinions, perspectives and also generation gap thinking. Exactly the same thing happened to me and i just can't resist it. Plus, my parents are just not like those ordinary parents. Almost everyday since the day i was born, my parents seldom have a peaceful time at home when both of them are around at the same time. They are just not romantic at all and i don't know how they got to know each other. Almost everyday, due to some petty things, they quarrel with each other and scold me or my sisters. Well, i have digressed too much on that and i'd be better to tell my stories straightforward now.

Just have a question to all bloggers who read this, can all of you stand tough in a family that filled with critics and cursing as well as scolding by parents almost everyday??? Well, that's exactly my situation now and i get scolded by my parents almost everyday. I've spent too much time in front of this computer until 3am everyday since the day i finished my major SPM exams and they just can't understood it. They thought i have been too obsessed with the computer and thought that i am totally insane. For these few days or maybe weeks, my parents got infuriated very easily and any petty thing that they dislike will ignite the "fire" inside them, and the victim'd be definitely me. They cursed and criticized me repetitively until i got really sad deep down my heart. I just can't feel the presence of love in this family. I just love my siblings, but seriously i don't have any feel of love towards my parents. The solution? Chatting with friends and expressing my feeling via Internet until i got better. I don't think i want to jolt down their cursing and critics here as i'd be more anguishing. Anyway, thanks to all my friends who patiently consoling me when i was really down every time, I've the courage to survive in this family without the presence of love. When can i free from all of these torments? I just can't bear it anymore. Someone please help me out of this!!! 

*Ke Yang, the jokes i meant just now are the sarcastically critics and curses.*

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